CL

funny but sad.

it's nature people

Every Monday my office gets a floral arrangement delivered to the office to be kept at the reception desk (where I sit most of the day). Often times they design the arrangements based on the current season or holiday. This was the case this Monday when they delivered a really nice arrangement adorned with sprigs of evergreen branches. It's really beautiful with huge red flowers and orchids along with the pine/juniper/cedar branches. Now to me the smell of these trees is instantly recognizable as an evergreen tree which I immediately associate with Christmas. Because of wreathes I'm sure. Also I will be the first to say that the smell was very strong as they were freshly arranged and being kept in a somewhat small area but the reaction to this arrangement has been insane. First of all apparently people from LA have no idea what these trees smell like because about half my office has commented on them. Most people have no idea where the smell is coming from despite the fact that the arrangement is right there. I have been asked by at least 5 people if that smell is cleaning liquid. For those that realize it is coming from the arrangement I would say about 98% think the smell is horrible. And basically no one has recognized it as the natural smell the branches should make. The smell has been describes as: rotten trash, cat pee, urinal cakes, dirty rags, and the vague something rotting. Now like I said the smell is strong but I like it. I like the smell of pine/evergreen trees, which much to every ones disbelief, is what this smells like.

Maybe this is not weird and I just am having a hard time realizing the some people have never experienced this smell before but every time someone asks me about it I shake my head a little. Seriously go out and smell some nature sometime. And I get that living in a city like LA you don't get a chance to smell a spruce that often but I grew up in the country and I knew what homeless people smelled like. And trust me this arrangement smells much better despite what people in my office seem to think.

clean

I never would have thought that I was the type of person to be that bothered by an unclean apartment but it is becoming apparent that as I get older I find cleanliness more and more important. Not that I was ever a slob or anything but I use to never be bothered by dirt. I guess I felt I was allowed to have a dirty apartment because I was in college but now that is not the case.

That being said I'm very discouraged by the fact that I can spend almost a whole weekend cleaning and my apartment never looks the way I want. The kitchen counters are stained (and will NOT come clean), as are the linoleum floors and there is dirt literally painted into the walls. When I clean I like to see results and in this apartment I don't get those to the degree I would like. Though it is definitely an improvement for sure.

prop 8

Op-Ed from the Human Rights Campaign about prop 8.

Soon I will so an actual post about the election.

I Voted

I voted this morning.



Now I'm just sitting at work freaking out. I've been nervous about it for awhile but now I don't know if I can take it. I may need to get a drink at lunch.



Go Obama!

For Rachel

I have a gym stalker...

The first time I noticed him I was running on the elliptical trainers and he was on the one next to me. I noticed him because it seemed that he was staring at me while I ran which is weird and uncomfortable. I thought there was a chance that he was not really staring just generally looking in my direction but seriously who looks at the person running next to them at the gym. Anyway, I kinda brushed that off. Then the second time I knew for sure he was being a creep. Again he got on the machine next to me and basically just looked at me the whole time he was there. But not at my face/ass/chest it seemed like he was looking at my stomach/upper thigh - which is not an entirely sexy area. I kinda wanted to give him a 'wtf face' at the time but it was so weird I just kept looking ahead not wanting to catch his gaze. I should add that he is at least 60 years old and not at all attractive; he does not look good for his age. The THIRD time I did give him the face. I knew now there was no coincidence about it because even when there was basically no one on the ellipticals he still got on the one right next to me. I think however the fact that I looked at him at all only fueled what was about to happen.

After running for about 15min he got off the machine. When I run I'm not really paying attention so I did not realize he was standing next to me for a bit. Then he touched my arm and I looked to see that he was holding out a business card with his name and number written on it. Written on because this was not his business card but one he had gotten from the front desk at the gym and just added his info. I took the card (for some reason, first reaction i guess) and gave him a seriously confused look. This is when he made the 'call me' hand gesture and mouthed those words (as I refused to take my headphones off). I continued to look at him with concern and bewilderment while he walked away. I honestly think I was in shock. It's one thing for a creepy old man to stare at young girls at the gym but it's a whole different thing to think you have a chance with one.

Now I'm afraid to go to the gym. I have been there once since then and though he was there he kept to himself. Hopefully the fact that I will not be calling him will make him realize that, no I don't have daddy issues (damn, grand-daddy issues almost) and he will move on. Fingers crossed.

good stuff

another article...this one about Colin Powell endorsing Obama.

We all know a lot of these moves are for very political reasons but I think Powell in many ways is generally doing what he thinks is best for the country.


“he has met the standard of being a successful president, being an exceptional president. I think he is a transformational figure.” (About Obama)

“Don’t give up on the political process; fix it[...]It’s a great system. It just needs tidying up.”

we can't wait

I was reading this article and getting pissed off. I understand that the economic situation is affecting all aspects of business and credit but I see the act of abandoning new clean energy as purely motivated by greed. The fact that oil and natural gas prices are down now makes companies and investors move away from clean energy because it is more expensive. But oil being down does not increase the supply. This is just another element that stalls the development of new methods that it is so clear we need. The greed surrounding this industry just disgusts me. That even in the face of the fact that we are reaching the end of oil people are still willing to wait on green energy just to make a little more money. I realize we live in a capitalistic society but really are the people in charge of these industries that willing to turn their backs on everyone else and are we as a society fine with letting them do it. We have a lot of responsibility as well in the situation we are in. Americans are always looking for the cheapest way around a situation usually at a much greater cost down the road. I realize in a lot of ways I'm an idealist but it bothers me to think that we (include in that whomever you want) are still not willing to do what it takes as a country to get this gone. I think it's clear that this is not just an issue for earth loving hippies anymore it's fundamental to our national security our economic position and our general quality of life (not to mention our planet, which I still care about).

egged

This happened awhile ago but I think it deserves an entry.


While sitting outside at a certain frozen yogurt place one night awhile back I, all of a sudden, became aware of something flying through the air in my general direction. In the second before it made impact, on the side walk right in front of me, I thought it might have been a snow ball (I realize it was LA in September and there are no snow balls here but in that second my mind was not able to process all that). It turned out to be an egg not just one egg but two. The second one landed off to my right near a table of older women. The egg never in fact hit me (thank god or I would feel forced to track down the bitches that threw it) it landed on the sidewalk in front of me; yoke and shell spattered on my bag and a little on my shoes. No real harm done (though the older ladies did not seem to think so as they made something of a fit to the yogurt place employees). The point is who the fuck throws eggs at people??? I did not see what car they came from as they were very quick about the whole thing which added to the very surreal element of the experience. Unless they were trying to enact revenge on someone sitting there and just have bad aim I don't see the point. What kind of sick joy do you get out of thinking that you may have just hit someone in the face with a raw egg.

another article

It seems I'm on a Sarah Palin Kick.

oh my

read

teeth

Things that are ok when you have just had your wisdom teeth removed (but are frowned upon normally):

- eating ice cream and pudding in the early afternoon (and not feeling bad about it)

- taking 2 to 3 naps a day

- telling your boss that you are excited about the prescription pain medication you are taking.

It's been awhile

I've become a bad blogger...

Anyway, went to Vegas for Labor Day weekend. It was a lot of fun. I needed to get out of LA and just go somewhere where I did not have to think about anything. So Vegas is good for that. Check out the photos !

I feel like there is a lot of stuff I want / need to do right now. But as always it's so hard for me to get motivated. I've been thinking about maybe taking a class or something, maybe painting or photography. I miss being creative and whenever I try to start something now I just never end up really committing to it. I'm sensing a pattern. I need to work on this.

My wisdom teeth are killing me. They are coming out on the 11th. I'll be glad when it is over but I'm totally freaked out about actually getting it done. I can't explain it and it totally makes me seem like a wuss but teeth freak me out and if I think too much about what is actually gonna happen I start to seriously consider calling it off. But I won't.

Also jesus christ I can't believe it's September (I feel old just saying that but seriously where does the time go). August was a hard month, here's hoping September is better.

you are a creep

Today this guy comes into our office saying he has a meeting with one of the people in our legal department, after a few minute it becomes clear that he does not have a meeting but is trying to drop something off for them. While he is waiting for someone to come out his dude proceeds to do a number of creepy things. First he starts kinda singing/humming to himself. Then he opens a magazine and begins reading the articles half allowed, he also at one point was pacing around the reception area. Finally someone comes out to talk to him. Since he was basically just dropping stuff off they begin going through it on the counter in front of me. Sooo I realize right away when he begins drinking a half empty bottled water that someone in the office had left there. I almost wanted to say 'sir, do you realize you are drinking someone else's water', but I held back. He asks the woman if she can make a few copies of something, so while she is gone he starts asking me all this stuff. If I like working in this area, blah blah blah. Then he asks if I like NYC and how it compares to LA (which is weird to randomly ask because he had no idea if I've ever been there). I tell him that, yes I like NY and then talk about it a little. He goes, yeah I've never been there so it's interesting to hear about. Then he says something about the weather being better here and if only we could have a NY on the west coast, because (and I quote) he lived in NY for a few years and it was great. Excuse me, did you not say just 30 seconds before that you have never been to NY??? And you are STILL drinking that water. He asks a few more weird things like which venues I like, I'm then saved by the woman coming back with the copies he wanted. She leaves, he gathers his things nervously (and creepily) and then looks around like he forgot to do something. Now he has been here way too long and it's making me uncomfortable. I kept shooting him looks like 'why are you still here'. Finally he leaves and takes the water bottle with him. Weird.

Dog

These pictures are kinda small...ooo well.

There is currently a very smelly dog laying on the floor of my kitchen (probably in its own pee) with a plastic medical cone on it's head. This is another long story.



July 6th, while returning late that night, my roommate notices a dog running near the street, as she opened the garage the dog ran in and up to her car. So she calls me and I come down to asses the situation. It's a little black dog, I think about 6-8 months old, she was skinny but not that bad and she had a collar. We decide to take her to our apartment and then try to find the owners / figure out what to do with her.We posted a bunch of stuff on the internet saying we found her and checked the area for lost dog signs. A few days later my roommate takes her to the local animal shelter to see if she has a chip. Little did we know that when you take a dog to a shelter and tell them that you found it, they are legally not allowed to let you leave with the dog, something about how we could have stolen it (who steals a dog and then takes it to the shelter, stupid). So now the poor little puppy is in the big bad shelter, where they say they need to hold her for 4 days in case the owner shows up to claim her (they were not able in find a chip). These shelters are really really over populated and sad. Having already become attached to the dog there was no way we were gonna leave her in there knowing that it has such a high kill rate for the animals.



Come Saturday we show up to free her from the shelter. The plan is the take her and then try to find someone to adopt her ourselves (since the owners never showed to claim her). After a lot of confusion about whether or not we can actually take her, they let us know that since they have to get her fixed we can adopt her but they will keep her over the weekend and take her to the vet on Monday. We pay the $90 and fill out all the forms. It was sad that they would not let us take her for the weekend since she got all excited thinking she was leaving with us. My roommate picked her up Monday from the vet after the surgery. It was an additional $80 because they claimed that she was in heat (which may or may not be a scam). We wanted the vet to give her a bath before the surgery since we got sooooo dirty at the shelter and because you can't wash them for 2 weeks after the surgery. BUT they said it would be at least $50 just for a bath so we decided against it. Possibly a mistake. She is very stinky and has caked on dirt in her fur. Gross. Also she is way skinnier then we was when we first found her and she is shedding like crazy. However she is really sweet and having her around makes me really miss having a dog, even if she smells and is dirty.

If anyone is looking for a dog let me know!

I have a nemesis - long story

For awhile now I have been parking in a lot where my work pays for monthly parking access. They give us little mirror tags each month which we are to hang on the mirror (which I did). Now the attendant who is there when I park in the morning knows my car so he knows I'm a monthly parker. However apparently the night attendant does not so he complained to the morning guy that he could not see my tag (something about my mirror being too far back) so the morning guy asks if I can leave it on the dash instead, which I did. So being that I'm now required to move the tag on and off my dash I occasionally forget in the morning to put it up (usually not an issue). One evening when I am leaving the night attendant stops me - he needs to see my parking tag because I forgot to put in on the dash that day. Fine, whatever I show it to him. He immediately asks why it's not hanging on my mirror, I explain, to which he says "no one asked you to move it, the policy says it needs to be on the mirror or I can tow your car". We argue about this a little more (he actually gives me a printed copy of the policy, which is a fun read) until I realize it is stupid and I hang it on the mirror and consider the topic closed.

Until today. He stops me as I enter the building to park asking where my tag is. I point to the mirror and tell him it's right there. He tells me he can't really see it that well (I restrain from asking him what the hell he would like me to do about that). He then tells me I have the wrong parking tag. So not to make this story longer then it is already BUT the parking company delivers the tags to my work and then we distribute them to the employees, however they never ever get them to us on time so we end up having the ones from the previous month for about a week into the new month. Whatever this has never been an issue till now. I explain this to him and say there is really nothing I can do about it since it's his companies issue. He keeps telling me I have the wrong type of tag and should not be allowed to park here. For a minute I thought he was actually not going to let me park. I tell him I'll ask about it at work and he eventually gives up. So I tell my boss this. In part so she is aware and will maybe try to get them to give the tags to us on time and also because I don't want this guy stopping me all the time and basically being a jerk. I had to leave today at lunch for an appointment and when I get to the garage I see that a car is blocking mine in (this happens pretty often) I also note that mine is the only car being blocked in (so it was probably not on purpose but I wonder...). When I ask him to move the car he starts telling me how CIM complained to his manager about the tag issue and someone was saying that he told them he could have their car towed. At this point I'm pretty uncomfortable with this conversation because he definitely thinks it was me. He then denies saying anything about towing the car and says how he is gonna get in trouble because I have the wrong tag. Anyway it was weird and I don't like it. I thought maybe if his manager told him people were complaining he could knock it off not try to confront me about it. I just want to not be stopped every morning when all I'm trying to do is park.

So this is probably not a big deal but I enjoy blowing things out of proportion it takes some of the boredom out of my day.

Also when I got back from my appointment he had closed the entrance to the garage (they do this sometimes when it gets really full) so I had to park in a different lot...right now I think the score is parking attendant - 2, me - 1. I'm going to have to work on that.

oh no

not good

bored at work

Due to my department at work hiring a temp to work on a project (this is stupid on a level that need not be discussed, but whatever) and them setting her up the in other desk that I use when not at the reception desk I have found myself with a good two hours everyday with out anything to do and no computer (place to sit for that matter) to waste time on. I basically wander around the office and organize useless things (or go on walks/get coffee/go shopping) during this time. The one benefit of this is that I now value my time in front of a computer more.

fun things on the internet:

this

that

this I don't get

and of course

something's going on here

I think I'm starting to show the early signs of sleep-walking (well maybe not), regardless something very strange is happening. You should know that as a general rule I'm always cold and when I sleep this is made even worse by the fact that I'm not moving/the AC is really strong in my room. So I tend to sleep wearing a lot of clothes (I'm very sexy). The first time 'it' happened I went to sleep wearing yoga pants, t-shirt, hoodie and socks (not joking about the cold thing) however I awoke NOT WEARING PANTS. I'm not a sound sleeper, I don't do things in my sleep and not remember it - at least I never use to. To make it worse my pants were across the room laying in my the closet. I definitely thought this was weird but I said 'hey maybe I just got really angry at the pants in my sleep and threw them from my bed'. Makes sense right?

Last night it happened again. I went to sleep in pants, a long sleeve shirt with a t-shirt over it (don't ask) and socks. This time when I woke up the long sleeve shirt was in a pile at the end of my bed. SOMEHOW in the night I took off both the long and short sleeved shirts and then put the short sleeved shirt back on. All with no memory of this whatsoever. Now I'm freaked out - what else am I doing in my sleep? Also if I got hot why put the t shirt back on? I have my own room, who am I being modest for? So it's settled, I'm going to start locking myself in at night.

grand canyon

so

I realized just now that I start way too many posts with 'so'. I have now begun the conscious effort to stop this behavior.

In other news...I finally bought a new computer!!!!!!! It's all very exciting. I have not had a ton of time to play around with it but there is such a HUGE difference between it and my old computer. I was amazed at how shitty my old screen was; I guess I never really noticed.

My goal is to post some pics this weekend - I started this blog with the intention of posting a lot of pics and that has yet to happen (due to the crappy slowness of my old computer).

...

I was on flickr today and clicked on this profile without realizing what it was. *WARNING* these photos are extremely graphic.

I'm always torn about things like this. On one hand I think people need to realize how bad the situation is and really it is beyond what I ever imagined - at the same time it runs the risk of being viewed for sick interest (we are all guilty of this). It's things like this as well that make me realize how much the internet/technology has changed everything about how we receive information. We can get things raw and unedited (even when the government is trying to limit that) from so many sources that were never available to the public before.

I can't say if I think this is all good. I guess like most other things affected by technology I think it is both positive in negative in varying degrees.

craigs list, you are always there for me

So this evening sitting at my desk at work trying to think of something to look at on the internet that would keep me entertained until I get off I thought 'ooo there might be new craigslist best of's' '...

dead birds

catbus?

cat

This is just the beginning; sadly people kept asking me to do work so I still have a lot to read. But tomorrow is friday and god knows I won't be doing any work.

crazy people on the phone

So I spend a decent amount of my time at work on the phone with people; for the most part these are brief interactions with people who have simple requests. However every once and awhile a crazy person will call complaining about something (I work in an office that does real estate investment as well as manages a lot of different properties) usually it's tenants or potential tenants. Anyway the reason they call is not really important. What is important is that I have come to realize that crazy people all behave the same way on the phone (it's entirely likely they are the same in person as well but I try to avoid speaking with crazy people in person).

You can tell you are talking to a crazy person the phone when:

1.They begin by speaking to you like you already refuse to help them, even if you are being helpful.

2. They either refuse to give you their name (though they assure you they are important) or they are over abundant with their personal info. Full name/address/telephone # and cell #/email/website if applicable. Note you did not ask for all of this.

3. They speak fast (especially considering they are asking you to write down every word that is coming out of their mouths so that when you relay this message you don't mess it up) and paranoid, kind of like they fear someone is going to jump out at them from where ever they are.

4. Since they are inevitably calling because they have been slighted in some way (crazy people are always getting fucked over) they will say numerous times that they are not someone to be treated like this and they have never in their lives been in such a situation. Though considering they are usually dicky on the phone I find it hard to believe that no one has ever been rude to them before.

5. They have a confused sense of social/business hierarchy. "No the principal of the company can't talk with you right now, yes I do understand you are important".

Now I don't think all the people who call in with complaints are crazy, but some definitely are and for the most part they all exhibit the above traits. Also I think they are a special kind of LA crazy. I don't think the false sense of superiority is as big an influence in the crazies of other places.

Who wants my stuff when I die?

I have reason to believe that I'm actually dying. And not just in that 'we are all dying a little every day' way. My lymph nodes have decided to explode, which can only mean my death is imminent.

The Story:

Monday morning while at work I happened to notice a lump in my neck. It was kinda big (about 1/2in), at least big enough to make me worry a little since this is not a normal occurrence for me. Though I did not freak out about it too much. However as the day went on I noticed another one and then another. Now I was pretty worried as I knew they were multiplying. Once I got home my roommate said it was most likely my lymph nodes as the lumps were changing in size and all in areas where there are lymph nodes in the neck. I decided to try and sleep it off (as that is my cure for most things) this proved to have the opposite effect however. Not only were the ones in my neck still there this morning but I found one in my pelvic area (sexy, I know). At this point I began to mentally compose my will.

So currently the count is up to 6 - 4 in my neck, 1 right above my collar bone and the sexy pelvic one. It's very weird also because they are all on my right side. In the beginning when there were only the ones in my neck I thought maybe the wisdom tooth was to blame since the one on the right side has been super painful lately (apparently they can cause swollen lymph nodes) however now that seems less likely. I was able to schedule a doctors appointment for Thursday(hopefully I make it that long) so after that I should know more about what is going on.

The stupid thing about swollen lymph nodes is that they can be caused by about 175 different things. So I could have anything from a mild infection of some kind to AIDS or maybe cat scratch fever or Mono or syphilis or ...

Basically I have begun putting people names on the items of value that I own. I don't want there to be any fighting over my belongings when I die.

bitching about it is working well so far...

As of late I feel pressure to decided upon a price, that when reached I will stop participating in this gas consuming culture. Not pressured to actually stop buying gas per say...more so that I can participate in conversations with outraged drivers. With gas very close to $4/gal. here in LA everyone seems to have this magic number; "that's it when gas gets above {insert magic number here } I'm buying a bike/taking the subway/not going to work anymore (you can fill in the blank with whatever ingenious money saving scheme you want). However I for one am not buying it. The only thing that is gonna happen when (not if) gas goes about $4 is that people are just going to be more pissed. Yes there may be a few people who seek out alternate forms of transportation but they will be the minority. As long as there is gas to buy people will buy it at almost any price.

This is sad I wish I believed people when they say they will radically change their gas consumption habits but I don't; I'm not just passing blame along I also will not stop driving. I will however probably limit how often I drive which I should be doing already.

diabetes? cake?

I think I have contracted diabetes; I say contracted because it happened much in the same way I imagine people to contract an STD. I made one simple mistake, in the form of a piece of cake and now I can feel the disease in my blood (I've never had an STD but in my mind you can also feel them in your blood). I'm now looking at the remains of said cake much as someone would look back on the night of a drunken hookup (this in my analogy is how the STD was contracted). I don't know all the symptoms of diabetes but if they include sluggishness, regret, the feeling that your blood is actually being turned into sugar along with the strong desire to take a nap, I have the disease for sure.

The saddest part is this happens every month when my office decides to honor those born in that month with above mentioned diseased cake and some good old fashioned office camaraderie. I should be use to this by now.

I have a lot of needs...

I need a vacation. I need to get out of LA. Preferably some place with a lot of trees and not so many cars. Though I love cities and definitely prefer living in them I will always need periodic trips to non-city areas to keep me balanced.

I need to get this together and stop being lazy about it.

Also I need to figure out this new doctor/HMO situation. And go to the dentist (yikes)!



I'm sure I could keep listing more, but I already seem needy enough.

Who said the Easter Bunny's not real?

Easter is the one time of the year that I really miss being a kid. Most people might think Christmas (and I guess that would be second), but for me Easter really makes me want to be 8 again. In an attempt to bring back the joys of childhood Easters past, I will shamelessly be dying eggs and eating candy come Sunday. But we both know it will not be the same. Despite my religious upbringing, that is not the part of the Holiday I miss (shocking I know), what I miss are the Easter egg hunts. I've never really taken a poll on the level of enjoyment other people got out of their Easter egg hunts, so I could be vastly misrepresenting myself, but I like to think that I liked them more then most people. They were a big deal in my house (if only to my brother and me). When my parents tried to do away with them one year we protested. My mom even hid eggs in the Boston Commons one year of college...it's a long story.

I honestly can't say what it is that made me love them so much...I'm definitely not a competitive person, so it was not the desire to get more eggs then my brother. I think I just really liked finding stuff, even more so if that 'stuff' was candy and money.

So anyone down to hide a few eggs in my apartment this Sunday? I promise to enjoy it more then any adult should.

Villa California

So they have been doing crazy mad renovations/improvements/inspections to my apartment building in the last month. I wish I could say it has made me want to stay there. I believe this was all brought on by the fact that the department of housing was doing inspections and undoubtedly our building did not fare well. So far they have:

- Sprayed all the apartments for cockroaches (which was VERY necessary since I believe they were on the verge of taking over the building)

- Did about 5 random inspections/maintenance visits to our apartment.

- Painted the hallways/courtyard areas/mailboxes/parking garage/pipes in the parking garage (random?) in addition to other things I'm probably not aware of.

Not that I don't appreciate them doing this work, but it has ended up being a pretty big pain (constantly having to park my car on the street, being woken early on the weekends so they can fix stuff, dealing with the LOUD construction sounds). And the building is still ghetto. The one thing I really wanted them to fix was the washer/driers - however that was a no go.

ooo...connecticut

My mom sent this to me today. I thought it was a perfect example of the fun and excitement one can expect from the great people of Connecticut (if you have ever been there you know there is not much else to do). Also some of them are really funny...Enjoy!

After reading this article about Neutral Milk Hotel's lead singer it caused me to spend some time thinking about creativity and crazy people.

[Note: you should read the article; then what I'm gonna say will make more sense.]

I'm always so inspired and fascinated by people like Jeff Mangum. He is one of those people with this amazing level of creativity that literally consumes everything about his life. He creates amazing music but it can't be argued that he is at least a little bit crazy. So what is it about the eccentric that makes them so gifted. Maybe they are literally so free from the norms of society they are able to break through to something most people can't. I also think what the article was saying about the fans being selfish is very interesting. When Jeff creates music it takes so much from him that he is severely emotional affect by it. So much so that he can't see himself creating another album because of what it does to him mentally. But that emotional output is what makes his music so good. It's a sick cycle.

As much as I realize I would never want this, I can't help but think that I would like to know what it is to be that creatively free. To make something that emotionally affecting. Even if it did make me a little crazy.

how I started off my day...

Who invented the cat-call? Seriously, I want to know. Many, many years ago did some drunk guy call out 'hey babe, lookin' good' to some girl walking by and then somehow every guy around him was like, 'damn I bet that is a good way to get ladies'. Well its not. I'm sure it did not work for the first guy who tried it and it is still not working today. I say this from the perspective that it has never worked on me or anyone I know. Perhaps there are some women out there who do actually sleep with every guy who calls to them from a street corner/parked car/moving car/balcony or any other place where they can be heard. To those women I would say stop fucking up my theory (actually I would probably say a lot of things to them; not the least of which would be 'please stop') .

I realize this is not an original rant...women are always pissed about this, but I think we have the right to be. If I was walking to the train this morning wearing a leather mini-dress with thigh high boots I would at least be able to understand why the gentleman (I say that sarcastically) sitting by the street felt to need to say to me 'hey mamacita' as I walked by. I say understand but probably not really condone. I mean if you are dressed like that you ARE looking for attention and I can't really feel that bad for you. However, nothing I was wearing featured leather or could be mistaken for something a stripper would wear so I don't see what provoked that comment.

Going back to why men do that. I mean really...has it ever worked? What makes men feel the need to comment on women passing by? I realize it's generally only sketchy guys (and really drunk ones) who do this so I'm sure what motives them is something I can't even comprehend (nor would I want to). But every time it happens I inevitably spend part of the day thinking about why. Not so much that I'm mad (though it does piss me off) more because I can't understand it.

Sorry that was long...

Also, how exciting to live in a city where I can be cat-called in different languages.

Election Anonymous

I think I'm addicted to reading about the election. At first I thought this was a good thing. Reading is good, being informed is good - where's the down side right? Then I realized there is no way I can continue this level of enthusiasm until November. I'm starting to get burnt out and it is only February...

But this realization did not stop me from reading two articles about it online today. One about Obama's voting history in the Senate the other about McCain and some lobbyist. And frankly I think it was all things I have read before just mashed up in a different way. I'm not sure how this happened, but I'm sure it has something to do with me being neurotic.

blahh

I feel restless lately. I’m not sure what it is. I need a change. We are planning on moving within the next month and a half (or so) - that will be a good change. And so over due.

I’m starting to miss the diversity of things I did while in college – not the actual going to class part, just the different things I was involved in. I know there are things I could get involved in here, but my lack of motivation is a problem. Every time I start to think about when and what I would get involved in I somehow end up talking myself out of it. Which is lame. I’m also really starting to miss being involved in theatre. That is something that takes a pretty large time commitment and I’m just not sure how to figure that out with my current work schedule.


On a related side note – I wish I did not rely so much on ‘new and different’ things to make me happy. Whenever I start to feel this way I always find myself thinking about things I want to buy (a camera, a computer etc.) and though those things are something I would use they are not really what will fix this bored/restless feeling.

Mexican Serenade

I'm not usually one to judge other peoples sex lives; normally I say whatever you’re into is just fine. However when it is 2am, you live in the apartment next to me and what you are into is loud horrible Mexican romance music I'm gonna have something to say about it. Especially when this is not the first time. So it's Saturday night about 1:30am when I decide to go to sleep, I lay down and all of a sudden I hear it. FUCK. My crazy neighbors are playing that music again. This is about the 3rd time I have heard it (not all these times was I trying to sleep so I have a little tolerance for it). Now I guess I'm just assuming they are having sex since it's usually late at night when I hear it, it's turned up really loud and the music has a distinctively cheesy lovemaking quality. Not wanting to spoil the moment I think I will give them some time (I'm a considerate person). But after the 5th time hearing the same song (I guess that one is really sexy - too bad it is all in Spanish and I have no idea what they are saying) I decided it's either their sex lives or my sanity. So I bang on the wall (it's now almost 2am)...Nothing. Fucking Bitches. I wait a few seconds and hear that same song start up AGAIN. I bang louder. Finally they turn it down so that I barely hear it. I climb into bed feeling a little crazy...I'm pretty sure I had nightmares about being attacked by a group of Mexican musicians.


Also maybe I'm just not romantic but I don't understand wanting to listen to some super cheesy melodramatic music while having sex. I would not be able to keep a straight face.

The Magic of Hollywood

While eating my lunch in an outside courtyard this afternoon (it was really warm today) I over heard the following:

*For this to make sense it's important to know that this evening there was going to be a Democratic National Debate at a theatre right down the street from where we were. Also Hollywood is full of crazy people.

Scene: Two 35-40 year old flamingly gay men and their dog [Cuba] sit outside a Fresh and Easy on Hollywood Blvd.

Gay #1 [the flamiest of the two]: OMG have I shown you the forks they have here?

Gay #2: Yeah, how they are so tiny?

Gay #1: I KNOW. They are so Fresh and Easy.

Random gay banter continues. Punctuated by the occasional outburst. After a few minutes this woman walks up to them.

Woman: [In amazing british accent] Hello, I was wondering if I could ask you a few questions regarding the election? If you plan on voting that is?

Gay#2: Um, sure.

Gay #1: Are you going to put us on Television? Are we going to be stars?

Woman: No, I don't have a video camera. But it will be going on the internet.

Gay #1: Well talk to him [referring to gay#2] I'm having one of those days.

Woman: [attempting to talk to the one guy] Ok, so I'm just going to ask you if you have decided who you are going to vote for, what influenced your decision, and what issues are most important to you.

Gay #1: [talking over the woman] Do you ever have one of those days? You know what I mean right?

Gay #2: [to gay #1] Oh my you are positively hyper today. [to woman] I'm voting for Hilary...I love Hilary.

Woman: Ok, what influcened that decision.

Gay #2: oh I don't know...ask him.

Gay #1: No don't. I'm voting for Hilary too. Though I think the whole political system is a sham. They are all robots.

Woman: [to gay #2] Well you must have some reason you chose her.

Gay #2: I'm voting for Hilary because I love her hair...she has AMAZING hair...I love her hair.

Gay #1: We both love her hair.

Gay #2: I love her hair, her persona, I love her husband.

Woman: [laughing] I see. What issues do you think are important. Which ones pertain to you.

Gay #2: I guess the economy. Yeah I think she is very strong on the economy.

Gay #1: [to woman] where are you from?

Woman: I was raised in London. But I was born in Mexico.

Gay #1: Ooooo, where?

Woman: Mexico City.

Gay #1: I LOVE Mexico City...it is full of aliens. Are you an Alien? Have you even seen them?

Woman: No I have never seen them, but I've heard.

*Gay #1 then starts talking to the woman in Spanish for awhile. She then asks if gay#2 can also speak Spanish.

Gay #1: NO he can't speak.

Gay #2: Un Pequito.

Woman: Oh. Well let me get your photos for the internet.

Gay #2: We should pose with Cuba.

Gay #1: Oh GOD don't take my picture I'm too old.

*He then strikes a series of elaborate posses.

The order of this has changed a little due to the fact I can't remember it all word for word, but that was pretty much how it went down. When I left they were attempting to get the dog to look into the camera 'dramatically'.

I wanted to take the dog. Someone should give Cuba a better life.

It's a post

soo...I realize my posting is slacking, BUT that is because I keep wanting to post from home (most of these are done at work, shh don't tell) in order to upload some rockin' pictures. However when I do attempt to do just that my computer has other plans. They generally include only allowing me to open one window at a time, freezing when I try to upload said pictures or just randomly shutting off because it fucking feels like it. Frustrating.

Which leads nicely to another point; I'm gonna buy a new computer (this weekend I think)! I'm super excited; I've had my current computer for going on 7 years. Though we have been through a lot together, it is time to get a computer that still remembers what it is to be a computer. It shall be a mac...the cheapest one. I was gonna wait till the next time I got paid, but I'm financing anyway so whats the difference right? RIGHT!

So in summation expect a post with pictures soon...actually don't, since I'm sure it will take me a while to get shit onto that computer. Hmm, whatever.

tmi....maybe?

Things I've learned about myself recently:

1. I should never live alone. My roommate having two weeks off over the holiday season planned trips home and to Boston for those 2+ weeks. I knew going into it that being alone in my apartment for about a week and a half (I was also going home for a few days) would freak me out, however I did not fully realize how I would react. I have to say that I did a better job of getting out and about than I thought...I did most anything in my power to spend as little time as possible in my apartment. But during the time I was there I turned into a total freak. I was super antsy and kinda paranoid; at one point I realized I was pacing around my apartment for no reason. Though I always talk to Sherri's cats, I was basically carrying on full conversations with them...they contributed very little. I'm sure I did other borderline insane things as well but am simply not aware of it. I probably should not tell people this because it totally makes me seem crazy but I just feel people should be aware.

2. I am not patient. I don't really feel the need to explain this; just know it is the true and I never really realized it before.

really???

what the #*&%