Resolute

Normally I dislike New Years resolutions. It's been years since I actually made one. It seems no matter what you resolve to do or not do you always end up disappointed in yourself. I think this is because people tend to set unrealistic goals - go to the gym 5 days a week, watch only 4 hours of tv a week, stop eating chocolate, drink less, etc. So in the vain of unrealistic goals I have decided in the year 2010 I'm going to try to do a blog post every day! It seems I've been missing that self deprecating feeling people get when they fail at their resolutions so I have decided to join in on the fun.

Now these posts will likely not all be as stellar and insightful as a lot of my posts in the past have been. Since I need to come up with something to say everyday but they should nonetheless be interesting.

Lets see how long I last...

Adult with a capital 'a'

Now is the time of year where I write an obligatory post about how quickly the year has gone by and how I can't believe it's December. Well goddamnit I CAN NOT believe it's December. But seriously though. This year has gone by unacceptable fast. Which I think can mean only one thing - I'm officially old. And if not old then officially an adult, which might be worse. People don't expect much from old people, they do however expect a lot from adults. Since turning 25 I've been thinking a lot about being an adult. And logically I know turning 25 meant nothing - I was supporting myself and doing as many adult things at 24 as now but something about it has made me contemplate what being 25 'means'.

Try to hold back mocking as I get all esoteric and self aware and shit but I think that being 25 has made be realize I need to get going with my life (figure out what I want it to be). Honestly, I realized this awhile ago and have been dealing with whatever that means all year but since October it's been a concentrated effort. I've never been one to have a life plan and I don't think even as an adult that is on the agenda but as an adult I know that I want certain things (big picture stuff not like shoes...though I really need a new pair of boots right now) and though it might seem strange, wanting things was not something I ever really let myself do (not because of some self esteem issue but more of a 'that's not the person I am' issue). Or maybe I just never thought about it that much. Age is just a number as they say and while that is totally true that number can still affect you. And though I joke about being old, turning 25 has not made me feel old per say just made me realize that I need to start deciding what I want being an adult to be like.